MY FIRST DAY AS A LIBERAL

I surrender. I’m now a liberal. My first act as a left-winger will be to propose new legislation. I submit the following for the approval of my new peers… When a woman gets married, the husband should have to quit his job. Now I know this may sound crazy, but bear with me. I think that by introducing this law we can cure many of the problems that we Democrats want to correct. After all, is this any crazier than providing guns to Mexican gangs on the border?

I FIGURED IT OUT!

I finally discovered the most basic difference between liberals and conservatives!  As many of you know, in October of 2010 scientists discovered the “Liberal Gene.”  I think I have actually determined the effect of this gene, dopamine receptor DRD4.  Are you ready?  Here it is!  Conservatives learn HOW to think, while liberals simply learn WHAT to think.  That’s it!

CONSERVATIVE FURY

A long-time, very dear friend of mine recently posted an article from the New York Times about the recent tragedy in Norway.  In true (NYT) form the piece opens with the words “A lone political extremist” and as would be expected is followed later in the story by, “Anders Behring Breivik [...] characterized by officials as a right-wing extremist.”  Well of course he is!